Coaching by Adam Smith

Staying Positive When Things Have Gone to Shit

As I am writing this, we are in the midst of a global pandemic, many of us are having to shelter-in-place, we can’t go out and see our friends and family, people are scared to go to the grocery store, there is a shortage of toilet paper, people are losing their jobs, the stock market is tanking, schools are closed – parents are losing their minds trying to balance being full-time teachers and working from home, and on and on. In times like these it can be very tough to find and focus on any positivity, for many of us it’s much easier to get lost in fear and despair. How can anyone possibly stay upbeat during all of this? I’m glad you asked!

When faced with any situation we can choose what we focus on and how we perceive the situation, we get to decide whether we see it as “bad” or “good”. That may sound like a load of crap, but let’s see what happens when we polish these turds.

Let’s start with an easy example from our current crisis, the “Great Toilet Paper Shortage”. People are stocking up on toilet paper like it’s the new currency; the grocery shelves are often fully depleted of this precious item, videos of people hoarding TP are circulating online, people are literally getting in fights over something they are just going to flush down the toilet. Time for the reframe. Charmin’s products have been selling like crazy and Charmin is a major toilet paper brand and part of Proctor & Gamble (P&G). Proctor & Gamble is an organization which is dedicated to strong ethics and does amazing things for the communities they serve. In fact, during the current pandemic, they are donating millions of dollars’ worth of products and financial support toward relief efforts for the COVID19 response (additional info). The increased demand for P&G’s products is having a positive impact on the world. That’s a pretty small example, but it shows how you can find something positive in an otherwise seemingly negative situation.

Ok, that one seemed like a stretch, let’s see some other examples – how about shelter-in-place orders? We are “stuck” in our homes, can’t go out and visit our friends and family, parents are having to entertain and teach their kids in place of their teachers, many retail and food service workers (and others) are out of work.

Reframe:

Stuck in our homes? Many of us are now able to tackle projects and learn new skills we have really wanted to work on, but couldn’t find the time or motivation to take on in the past. Now we have fewer excuses. My home is tidier than it has been for a long time.

Those long commutes? For most of us, those are temporarily on hold and we can focus that time and energy elsewhere, not to mention the savings in gas money and lower number of auto accidents. Look at the air quality in the cities where there is normally massive traffic, looks much nicer now.

How many companies previously wouldn’t tolerate employees working from home? Organizations all over the world have had to take a hard look at this standpoint and find a way to make remote work a possibility, reshaping the equation going forward.

Not being able to go out and enjoy the activities we normally look forward to? Look at how many great online events have popped up in the last couple of months; there are now online dance parties, free virtual museum tours, online fitness classes, and a whole lot more. Many of us are also saving a lot of money by not going out and splurging on these activities.

Can’t visit our friends and family? I had a virtual happy hour with my coworkers over Skype, I was able to have a beer with my dad over FaceTime, I have had Zoom video conference calls with friends, and I have been able to reach out to friends I haven’t seen for a long time through social media. While none of this can replace the physical connection, we can all find ways to stay engaged with the people we care about.

The job loss? At least in the US, our government has put in place financial measures to help people who have lost their jobs, business, or have otherwise been financially impacted by the current climate. While this doesn’t provide the same level of security a full-time job might, the economy will recover and at least we have additional resources to help us weather this storm.

How about the parents who are struggling to keep up with working from home and homeschooling their children? Even though this one is a major struggle for parents, think about the opportunity for the parents and their children. This is time that they get to spend together that they may not have otherwise. How many parents out there wish they had spent less time with their kids? How many kids (and adults) wish they had spent less time with their parents? Probably not nearly as many as those whom would have cherished additional time with each other.

While we can find negative aspects to all of the above, you can see where we can look for the positives in any situation. It’s all in what we focus on and where we put our energy, our thoughts shape our realities. Next time you find yourself bogged down with negative thoughts about a given situation, I challenge you to look for the silver linings and ask yourself, “Where is the good in this?” With this simple reframe, we can all live in a more positive world.

If you would like help on re-framing and changing your mindset, contact me to schedule some time to see how my coaching can help you live a more positive-focused life.

Share on facebook
Facebook
Share on twitter
Twitter
Share on linkedin
LinkedIn
Share on email
Email